6-30-17

The Male is jealous of the dog. in People suck. Cats are awesome. Dogs are alright.

  •  June 30, 2017, 9:35 p.m.
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The worst part being, he next to never talks about his feelings about ANYTHING, so I know that he either can’t, or won’t, ever talk about it. Until maybe a year or more from now, when it’s so far in the proverbial rear view mirror that it’s no longer either applicable or relevant; and emotions are things that pretty much have to be talked about, to fix any problems with them.
He hasn’t played with her since she was very small. I thought that was because I spend so much time training her, that he didn’t want to interfere. He next to never touches her at all, but again, I figured that was because he saw her as “mine”. (He never touches any of my stuff, as a general rule, despite repeatedly being told that he can.)
She will occasionally lick his hand, and he just ignores her, which I didn’t understand, but there’s a lot that I don’t understand, so I just filed it under “apparently illogical things to remember for future reference”, and left it at that.
The only time he ever speaks to her is to yell at her, either to shut up, or to get out of his room; both of which make sense when he’s trying to sleep for work the next day. (I put her in her crate with a rug, a toy, and food, at bed time. I’m trying to teach her to be still enough to sleep with, but so far, no dice.)
But tonight he told her to get out of my room, while I was right there; and we had a fight that amounted to me saying, “She’s my dog, this is my room, she’s doing what she’s supposed to do, so leave her alone”; and him saying that if she broke anything, particularly my tablet, he’d have to pay for it, so he could set whatever rules he wanted, and me responding with, “What are you, my dad? On principle, I’d rather have the dog than the tablet.” (There was a LOT more, that’s the condensed version.)
It's noteworthy that I've personally dropped said tablet several times. It's made from a sturdy, shock resistant plastic. It's also noteworthy that she doesn't touch *anything* she isn't supposed to with me present; and she hasn't gotten into things when I'm *not* present, either, for months. Not even the trash. - So his (faux!) concern is completely unfounded. Therefore, unless he's not aware of any of that, (and I don't see how that could be); I look for the *real* reason he might pretend to be worried about my stuff; and jealousy fits the bill all too nicely.
Then I told him that since he was tired anyway, and I didn’t feel like arguing with him, I was just going to go to the other room and paint. And as I gathered up my art supplies and carried them to the other room, he cussed and slammed things. I put in ear plugs, so I only caught bits. He always cusses and slams things after a fight, so that’s not indicative of anything; besides his own possible autistic traits.
But all of that adds up, to me, to him being very jealous of the dog.
I do spend an hour or two a day, playing with her while I feed the cats and clean the house. And she does know more than a few simple tricks. I do often remark on the fact that I’m proud of her, how much she’s grown, how she obviously loves me; and I almost daily say “Watch!” and get him to watch her doing tricks.
Today she started catching a shoe mid-air.
She makes me happy, and for some insipid f!@#ing reason, he does not like that.
Maybe if he got some animal of his own. Something that requires very little attention and doesn’t mind being left alone all day. Maybe a snake, or a turtle, or a monitor lizard. Or a piranha, to go with his personality.
Don’t worry, folks. He always apologizes after a day or two. It’s how to actually “fix” this that I’m frustrated by.
Ain’t nobody gonna make me choose between them and my dog. Not even my closest companion of the last twenty one years. Lupa da poopa is my friend. My big, scary looking, goofy, friend. She loves me. I think she’s neurologically incapable of doing anything besides honoring our relationship. Therefore I will return the favor.
Viva La Pitbull!

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